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01.04
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11.04
01.05
02.05
03.05
04.05
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06.05
07.05
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11.05
12.05
01.06
02.06
03.06

went to school today. it sucks. i'm too tired for anything and i just keep yawning and yawning. and there's band tml? god. i don wanto go for lessons. it just SUX.

to change ur mind is like trying to fly. it is impossible. i just want u to noe that u are always welcome back. the door is always open for u =)) all i can say is good luck.

u will regret.

it was hard but yet i have to accept it. i donno what u are thinking i don even noe who u are now. u came like this and left just like that.

i don even wanto noe YOU. cos u are simply ruining my entire life. u are making it bad to worse! just go away leave far far away from me. and i'm afraid of you. yes i am afraid.

u are just some hypocrite trying to be so nice and all. i wont be fool by u so easily. get it?

bonded by hearts.
this is boring. sch starts tml. sigh.BORING.

went to padang ytd for rehersal. had lunch in school at 11.40am and left for padang at bout 2pm. slept in the bus and when i woke up i was so so hungry. but theres nth for us to eat. sit at the holding area... FED UP on some person. and feeling so irritated. after the rehersal i tot can eat liao but we have to leave for school already. i slept in the bus again. was very tired. reached school finally i can eat. is like... except for water we hadnt eat anything for like.. 7hrs. WOW. ok. anyway i took 2 packets of rice.
went to hp. bought bean curd. me and hafizah was like craving for it. sat outside mac and eat. i ate 1 and a half packets of rice plus half a bowl of bean curd. I AM FAT =x. but i was really hungry.

went home feeling fat and sticky. slack ard for awhile then go and bathe. sit at my bro's room.. played a lil ms and i went to sleep. just donno why i was beat ytd. slp slp and slp. =)

so sch is starting. ...
yea wadeva.
i din notice that sch is reopening until someone told me. i forget who. but i don feel anything.. nt sad nt excited. nothing. just like.. normal... i mean how "excited" will u feel since u went back to school this WHOLE month nearly everyday? and looking like some kind of roasted pig? but i don mind thou i rather go for band then go sch for lessons. sigh.

talking bout lessons. i rmb my amths homework.. which i haven even print it out yet. i don bother also. i think i forget everything le. so sad. i shld buck up on my studies more. i make sure i improve in the final year if nt i'll just slit my wrist and die =x. oops.

i have ALOT of white spots at my legs and hands EEEWW!!! becos that timem i was perspiring and i went to bathe which was a STUPID mistake. fuck.

i'm fat now.

real fat.
sick. very SICK .

right now i'm not only sick. my skin colour is horrible. is just DARK. and i mean DARKKK. and once again i have lines on my arms and ankle =) niiiccceee~ -.-" i have blisters on my fingers and ytd i act smart while opening the superglue...i gt my hand GLUED. stupid.

i'm so sorry i'm not going for the class gathering. i noe it will be once in a while.but not that i don wan to go but i'm really very sick and i still have to go for band practices. si bei tired. and tml i have sectional oso... so sorry. but u guys have fun =). enjoy urself yea~

i lost my appetite. for this whole day i just drink a packet of teh-c and ate cup noodles. that was my lunch. din have breakfast and dinner. i just don feel like eating... i feel so sickkkkk. damn it.
went out with my darling percussion today. decided to go east coast. met outside the sch gate and took 55. i slept in the bus.. very tired after the performance early morning. and once again we gt the water bottle... the kitchen cupboard is gonna be full with water bottles that i gt from the performances -.-" anyway...
we reach east coast... walk a very very long distance and finally settled down. i din intend to get wet cos i din bring any extra clothes u see... but ya.. unfortunately i gt thrown in. i climbed up the boulder* and when i wanted to come down... i slipped and my palms is full of cuts ='(
and OMG they took off their pants! it was GOD DAMN GROSS. haha

got out of the water... walk with some of them to the bicycle shop... rent 5 double sets bike and ride back there...actually i wanted to ride with shilla....but we cant control the bike. so they ask us to change with they all. i ride it with zul. and gosh his butt is so big i can paddle at all =x oops. haha. we went to the 'hawker' I found seats... thank me =) haha. i waited for very long and some ppl...who is only drinking the blardy beer took forever to finish it.
we spent ard 90 bucks or so in everything.. bargain with the uncles =D
it was very hot very spicy... and now i'm having sore throat.

ride back to the bicycle shop return and we went to mac. have meeting and dismiss=) went home. very tired and i'm having flu and sore throat. i don think i can make it for the class gathering... cos except for today and sunday this whole week i have to go back to school for band. hmm..
hook on ms again. i mean there's nothing else for me to play. tried gth, tried rose, play some rich6 and thats all. there's nth for me to play anymore...i cant possibly play games like splinter cell? only my bro plays it...he LOVES to play such games..and i simply have no interest in any of it.

my june holidays is almost full. full with band of cos. and i'm trying to squeeze out some time from here and there just to like...meet up with frens and go out. not shopping. cos i'm broke. i cant find work either... lazy and i'm tired. like wat my cousin says... i shall go work only after olvl. i just don have the time to find work now.

bro dl madagascar... gonna watch it later.

hmm.
i try to run away from it but i cant.

an update of my knee. its just the middle part that hurts and surrounding is itchy. damn itchy. which is a good sign...it means it is recovering =D

is only the 3rd day of june. the time seems to pass slower than i thought it will be. but is better than going to school and surrounded by books. =) once i recover. i will get my butt out of the house and go crazy. yes i will.

sometimes i tell myself that u are gone. i told myself that u wont be here anymore. it hurts when i realise u are not by my side. i know.. we should get on with our life. so i tried to be optimistic. i try to stay positive. the times when we were together.. the times when we laugh about silly things and when we talk about everything under the sky. all these are gone. is just memories.
hah. change my blog skin. did this skin quite some time ago now finally put it up. :D

my knees are getting better... thou sometimes still oozing out those yellow DISGUSTING fluid. but it doesnt hurt that much now. my right knee is healing. ya. my mouth also. will be going back to band tml... =D first time to take bus ever since i fell down =x haha. serious. i din take any public transport ever since i fell except for cab. cos if i were to take bus, lrt or wadsoeva. everyone eyes will be concentrating on my disgusting knee. and i hate that look.. i just went downstair...ppl who walk pass will be attracted to my knees. sicko.

seems like they had alot of fun at the camp. thats great. was regreting now that i din go for it...even if i pass up the form...i cant go also... well, cos my knees are hurting. i will alwasy fall sick or fell down the day before a camp. ALWAYS. anyway... what was my class call themselves again?? oh ya.. EntHu . e2 haha.

not only my knees are rotting these few days...I am rotting also. rotting at home. eat, sleep, slack... and staring at the comp for long hours. =x thats all i could do. i tried to study...ya right. as if i will. i don even wanna touch my books... i did so damn blardy bad for my midyr. so bad so so badly done. i could simply kill myself on the spot. =)