Sunday, May 29, 2005
my lips are healing still kinda hurt and tight thou. and my knees are
rotting silent scream in pain.
played rich 6 with my kor and his gf. suppose to be i win de lor...in the end is kor win.argh =x
i wanto go see dentist tml but my lip cant stretch big..i scare it will bleed or smth cos is still nt fully recover
yet.
u are such a idiot freaking bastard and u are getting on my nerves! stop acting as if u are so close to me or so LES to me!! i'm STRAIGHT! u farking bastard pls for goodness sake keep ur blardy distance frm me!! and let me repeat this AGAIN. STOP ACTING AS IF U ARE SO CLOSE AND ACTING AS IF U KNOW ME VERY WELL. u are DISGUSTING!.. argh. just get away from me would ya!?
i wish i can rewind the time.
Saturday, May 28, 2005
when i say i'm stupid i really mean i AM stupid. everything just seems to get in my way. and bad things just loves to fall on the same day.
26th may 2005. is the
worse day of my life. i get back my results and i try to stay positive. i try to convince myself that nvm is just midyr don worry too much. but i just couldnt help it... i just cant control my emotion. i gt better during band even thou i was still bit down. while all these results thingy keep filling up my mind...i totally forgot abt the comics wenting return to me and i left it at study area. after band i just went off leving my comics there...and mrs azlan went to tok to me abt my results. after that we went to hougang pt mac as usual and i was busy planning abt june holis prog. cos of my band schedule... and i manage to squeeze some time out frm the busy june. and after eating finish and slacking when we were ready to go i suddenly remembered my comics. i so gan jiong and shawn said 4na still at sch..so called his fren to find for me... i saw the sec1s at hp asked them and they say is still there but shawn's fren said it isnt. i so gan jiong cos the comic add together like 50bucks lor i cant afford to lose it. so i ask shawn to come with me i ran back to sch. i ran. stupid me. i tripped on the sand and fell straight to the concrete floor with my face sliding on it and i chipped my teeth half. i was so shock i lie down there and stunned for a momment.i sit up and i was so scared the passerbys helped me up and an aunty put a plaster on for me... my legs are injured so was my lip.
.. i told shawn..''lets go, i don wanna go sch anymore i wanna go see a dentist'' so hailed a cab and went to the dental at rivervale mall. reached and realise it was close. so i say nvm...lets go home.
i reached home. ask my family whether i can fill my teeth back but they cannt one. i feel so so scared and i msged shihui. i just keep crying and crying and i cant stop. i don understand why bad things just falls on me...
my dad ask me wat happen is it becos of my results..i just shook my head cos i don wanto ans him. he see my report book and he say is ok just do better in final yr can liao. i feels better but seriously i wasnt crying only for my results but my stupidity.
i feel so stupid i feel like a freak. my leg now is infected and i cant even walk properly cant even straighten my leg. my lip feels so tight i cant even tok properly i cant even smile. i look into the mirror and i feels horrible. my legs hurt my mouth hurts. i even have difficulty drinking water...just plain water i cant even drink it properly and i feel tingly pain then it touches my teeth and when i stretch my mouth open.
stupid aint i. ran to sch for my comics.. HAHAHA. silly me... so silly. so retarded.
so stupid.
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
yup. is a good thing i've mentally prepared cos.. ya i failed. today we took back our emaths, amaths, chinese, chemistry, physics and geography.
so out of all this i failed 3. ben lai shi fail 2 one...but ya..tat *toot* MINUS OFF 1 mark frm my chem mcq damn it.
quite happy with my e and a maths...
and i hate it. my chinese gt a
yucks result. SUX. i want the OLD format!!!! this result is a
NO for me!
my chem ya i mention it above..actually just pass..
at least is a PASS. and minus off that
freaking one mark...i failed.
FAILED. arghs.
my physics...
pathetic.my geography?
forget it.damn. i'm
useless i shouldnt be in e2 in the first place.
can i drop out? =x.
Monday, May 23, 2005
suppose to meet at 10.30am... but i wake up at 10.30am. =x so sorry =P
went to play basketball with shihui,peijin, eugene and ziming. waileong and junxi went off b4 i come..go play
land ar..
orchard somemore..
anyway...bad news...i hurt my hand while playing...strain too much i think...nv do warm up =x. it hurts so badly.
went off ard 1pm. reached home and ask my aunt to massage for me and now my elbow area is
disfigured. it really hurts. cant strain it now...
tml must go sch..
SIAN. go also nth to do... wanto go at afternoon for band. but nahh...go school take papers back ar..i wanto see how i flunk it.. =(
going out later with cousin and her fren meg. ask mother leave money for me and she forget.. bad bad memory..i shall wait for her to come home then.
i'm
broke.
Friday, May 20, 2005
i am just PLAIN STUPID. u noe wat happen today? i gt CHEATED!!! i was so angry... even thou is just $1.50 but i'm not angry becos i gt cheated $1.50 but angry that i'm so stupid to get cheated by that si uncle!
me and shi hui went to far east.. after that we walk to tangs plaza there and sat down there... then there was this UNCLE, CENTER PARTING WHITE JACKET AND WEARING SPECS. he walked towards us and and said are u singaporean? i say ya.. he sat beside me and was saying wat.. i lost my mobile my ezlink and atm card. can u spare me some money i wanto go to pasir ris. i was SO STUPID TO BELIEVE AND I WILLINGLY GAVE HIM $1.50!!!! and he still dare to ask for 20 cents more but i told him don have le. after that he say wat...how can i return u and wadeva shit..we say no need. then shihui was like saying... he no money still can smoke? why cant he ask other ppl why us? then i think about it.. YA HOR!! i was so stupid so so stupid!! i walk and find him but he was gone.. cos i wanted to see if he is going ard to cheat other ppl too... i WAS STUPID LOR!! when he was talking to us.. we saw some peeps frm our sch sekali they tot we went out with that uncle GOSH.
I GOT CHEATED! AHHH!!!!
i'm just plain stupid.
Thursday, May 19, 2005
YES! its FINALLY OVER. it lasted almost 3 weeks and now i'm FrEe!!! oh yea!~ haha. but first. i have to be mentally prepare ya...i said this alot of times..cos i know i will do very badly for it.
is weird.
ytd i came home...i bathe and i went to sleep at 2.30pm. i woke up at 8.20pm. ate, and i went to study for bio till 12.30 am. slept till 3.30am i woke up again and study. i guess i'm too tired and stuff... cos i doze off awhile and i had HORRIBLE ILLUSIONS! is like a nightmare but i close my eyes barely 5secs. all those weird and scary image came floating in my mind. first i saw this person in my "dreams" he was standing at the kitchen there and walks towards me and having this weird laugh and wants to kill me. i gt a shock and i quickly open my eyes. i told myself its nothing so i doze off again and there it comes again. now is a chucky look-alike doll crawling towards my room and halfway he turned and face me and have this grin .. this scary grin. and theres just all these weird things floating in my mind. i was totally freak out. i jumped up and i quickly went to my parent's room and slept on the floor. peacefully. i guess i was oh so tired.
after exam.. we went out together to kovan. ya its the first time we went out
together. haha..went to BK and we were like laughing like nobody's business as if the BK is owned by us or smth. cos the whole place is filled with our laughter. wahaha.
went to took prints~ the first machine was ok it turns out pretty well...but the other machine is DISGUSTING. we have to squeeze like hell and we haven even prepare jiu take le. and out of 6 photos we only manage to choose 3. is so fast lor. dumbo. and YES. i agree with nessa. the workers there have major attitude problem. esp. the fat one. =x she said excuse me and she was like so buay song as if she own the whole passage way! HELLO? u work here and u
suppose to be polite to customers??? i din even offend u in the first place u
asshole. after that we went home. and i saw my pri sch mate in the mrt. she just sit opposite me and ya she still recognise me =D haha.
i feels that there is still exams going on... i don feel relax...i feel so tense up like there is a paper tml or smth. wat the hell is wrong with me? hmm...
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
AHHH!! ppl kill me PLS! i'm so stupid so damn bloody stupid! today we were having maths paper 1. was doing till i reached the last qns...somehow i don understand wat the hell izit toking about..i'm drained. so i went back to the front qns that i nv attempt in the first place.. i was doing and doing and i TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THE LAST QNS!!!! when they say pens down... i flipped and i saw the last qns.. BLANK!! i gt a shock man. i quickly scribbled...and i only manage to get the equation right! out of that blardy 5 marks i only manage to get ONE MARK! PATHETIC. i was totally at lost. i was like. gosh! wat the fark had i done!? why am i so stupid to leave a 5 marks qns blank and do a two marks qns!? GOD DAMN ME! i am so angry and pissed with myself. argh! FUCK! i'm gonna break down soon=x there's just too many papers... i mean. i only had one brain and this brain is pathetic. ok is PATHETIC. i cant squeeze anything in at all! i'm gonna flung it..yes i will flung it this time round. ARGH! i'll be SO DEAD!
Monday, May 16, 2005
god. i'm so damn bloody
fat argh. i cant seems to slim down no matter how much i've exercise.. how less i've eat. i shld just take a scissors and cut the excess fats off. damn.
anyway. had amths paper today. i was like..so much confidence in doing it. until after the paper when i ask ard...i gt so many mistakes lor. qi si wo le. forget it man. must prepare for that toopid bio and physics. damn. i wanna drop
all the sciences!
mentally break down. i'm tired.
u don have to comment on wateva i wrote in here! can u just bloody fuck off!? u irritates me ALOT. and i mean
ALOT. the sight of u just makes me wanna puke! fuck off u asshole!
Sunday, May 15, 2005
i saying this for the last time. i had enough of you. stop buggin me u freaking idiot.went studying with shi hui again today. she say don wan de lor~ when i ask her this morning abt 12am like tat..then afternoon lehh...call me to go study.. donno who HOR. =x haha. meet her at cp then we went to kfc. stupid her..make us change sit 3 times. like aunty like tat.. first is table dirty then change then she say wanto go sit at the corner there. change again then she say hot. change again. -.-" anyway. we ordered lemonade =D so we started studying. and we doing amaths
again. i was munching on the strange coloured biscuit i brought..there was green cream..purple orange pink. is weird. wonder where my dad gets that frm. after tat she told me she was hungry...and we looked at the time..4.30pm. i tell her to eat at 5pm. then i order a cheesefries too. fat. =x
then continued.
after that gt two indian gals. so darn irritating. they think wat. kfc they buy one arh...came in to eat famous amos. wat the fark. still put their bloody smelly feet on the chair. HELLOO??? ppl SIT on it lor..think ur feet smells nice arhh. kns. but they went off fast. thank god.
we left at 7.30pm. walk her to mrt station and i went home. was crossing the traffic light and saw my pri sch mate.i spot him becos i saw the dog. but i don think that's his dog. anyway. he din see me. then i saw aslamiah...haha SUAY. haha. that cheeky gal.
i don intend to eat. but there's porridge .. and i gt tempted.
argh. f a t.
Saturday, May 14, 2005
if u don like it. u can jolly well don come my blog ok. nobody invites u to come here. and U don have to give any comments! pain in the arse~ shoo... go away. why must u add "spice" to my wonderful life?? i really don understand. why must u always be like this... u can change for the better. serious. and i will look forward to the day when u have changed. u will see a smile frm a distant. =)went to burger king with shi hui today. went studying with her. was doing amaths the WHOLE day. and my neck hurts. i really think that i will flung my stupid midyr. and i'm mentally prepared for it =D
after that we went to hawker to have our dinner. yup. i'll be so f a t. then we went to popular then slack ard at the mall... and we laughed. haha. becos of some stupid things i've said =x hahaha.
exam faster finish ahhh faster faster. i want to go play till i siao when the exams after over.
damn u man. i had enough of u and ur nonsense
Friday, May 13, 2005
seriously, sometimes ppl can be really irritating. they just kinda pester u..and when u ignore them they will say things that makes u feel so guilty and w a d s o e v a. ok and i had enough. i thought i can take it but no i dont. is really getting on my nerves nowadays. would u kindly
get out of my life?
i noe i'm mean... but i tried my best to be nice to you... but when i do that... u will start irritating me even more and well i cant take it u get that? i mean... know ur limits man.
ok. russell peter is SUPER FUNNY. i can laugh like hell... hes great! haha. !xobile!! Whahahah. and italians wat the fark? omg omg. i can laugh till i duan qi ah. hahaha. watch ur language. HAHAHA. ok i'm going mad. but if u guys wanna watch i'll send it to u all. trust me is HILARIOUS. ronald send it to me first so ya thx =D whooo.. relieve stress man..hahaha.
lalalalala~
stop making stupid guesses. enough is enough... can u guys get a life?! don say anything just becos u FEEL like saying it. think is funny izzit? and wat's next? wanna let the whole world noe? fuck off assholes. to think that u all are matured. i was so wrong! damn u all. argh.
i'm gonna flung my chem and geo for sure. i still stay up the whole night till 5am to study and now? turns out to be so bad...i cant even finish my chem paper. and i don even noe wat the hell the geo paper is writing. blehs. anyway... just hope that i'll at least pass other papers.
i wanto go sentosa. i cant wait for the day to come. faster faster i wanna take a break. so stress up now. eek.
say that again i'm gonna skin u alive. bastardS.
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
its only may. sch only started for like 5 months. and so many things have happen. sigh.
i don think i have the right to sigh. i'll just keep my mouth shut cos i feel so stupid that day. acting like i was so... wateva. is over now.
some ppl are just so sickening they nv noe when to stop. i just wanto walk up to them. scream right into their face and slap them left and right. =x.
blog. when u blog things.. ppl tend to imagine alot of things. is like a sin to blog things. i use to blog alot of stupid things. and i have learnt my lesson. once, i blog something and my frens just push the blame on me just becos wat i have wrote in here. bloody hell. i was so angry. but anyway...that was like... a yr ago le... no point brooding over it.anyway...
tml is social studies paper. now i feel like sleeping. wake up later in the night to study bah. yawns.
good luck peeps! =D
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
is hard to be optimistic about life. things are just happening too fast...so fast that i cant follow up. i was much happier than last 2 yrs... i laughed i joked around... i feel so happy. and i even like to go to school nowadays... is just so happening and i don wanna miss out any of it. But today... things happened. and i feel so awful i feel like puking... i feel so... s t r a n g e.
i am angry...so damn fucking pissed with some bitches. thick skinned fella with no sense of shame! yucks. disgusting ppl...so intoxicated.
i feel insulted.
i feel hurt. some things really better nt say. but since is already said.. we'll just accept it... and is hard. . u guys nv think of the other side... never. maybe guys have different thinking compared to girls.. and no matter wat...i guess u guys will nv understand it also.
we wanted to noe the truth and now we know it. it make us wonder... are we really so in the wrong? u make us feel . . . . u make us feel so speechless.
u made us think about it... and i do. but have u ever think of the reasons?
that word.. that stupid foolish word u said. u hurt her.
that word.
...
...
i feel so damn bloody angry.... i was so pissed. so damn piss off...